Zinny's wit

i just met the dog from marley and me at robert's house.
it's really amazing that dogs like that exist.
:)

for some strange unknown reason,
the christian channel here keeps playing pop from my past, no joke, here's my jukebox selection for the week that has managed to freak me out. And the male slave is arriving soon! haha...oh well, my esteemed cousin is.

here we go.

she grew up with
the children of the stars
in the hollywood hills and the boulevard
her parents threw big parties
everyone was there
they hung out with folks like
dennis hopper, bob seeger, sonny and cher

now, she feels safe
in this bar on fairfax
and from the stage I can tell that
she can't let go and she can't relax
and just before
she hangs her head to cry
I sing to her a lullaby, I sing

everything's gonna be all right
rockabye, rockabye
everything's gonna be all right
rockabye, rockabye
rockabye

she still lives with her mom
outside the city
down that street about a half a mile
and all her friends tell her
she's so pretty
but she'd be a whole lot prettier
if she smiled once in a while
`cause even her smile
looks like a frown
she's seen her share of devils
in this angel town

But, everything's gonna be all right
rockabye, rockabye
everything's gonna be all right
rockabye, rockabye
rockabye

I told her I ain't so sure
about this place
it's hard to play a gig in this town
and keep a straight face
seems like everyone here's got a plan
it's kind of like nashville with a tan, but,

everything's gonna be all right
rockabye, rockabye
everything's gonna be all right
rockabye, rockabye

everything's gonna be all right
rockabye, rockabye
everything's gonna be all right
rockabye, rockabye,rockabye, bye, bye
bye, bye
shawn mullins, rockabye

So long ago, I don't remember when That's when they say I lost my only friend Well they said she died easy of a broken heart disease As I listened through the cemetery trees I seen the sun comin' up at the funeral at dawn The long broken arm of human law Now it always seemed such a waste She always had a pretty face So I wondered how she hung around this place Chorus: Hey, come on try a little Nothing is forever There's got to be something better than In the middle But me & Cinderella We put it all together We can drive it home With one headlight She said it's cold It feels like Independence Day And I can't break away from this parade But there's got to be an opening Somewhere here in front of me Through this maze of ugliness and greed And I seen the sun up ahead At the county line bridge Sayin' all there's good and nothingness is dead We'll run until she's out of breath She ran until there's nothin' left She hit the end-it's just her window ledge (chorus) Well this place is old It feels just like a beat up truck I turn the engine, but the engine doesn't turn Well it smells of cheap wine & cigarettes This place is always such a mess Sometimes I think I'd like to watch it burn I'm so alone, and I feel just like somebody else Man, I ain't changed, but I know I ain't the same But somewhere here in between the city walls of dyin' dreams I think her death it must be killin' me (chorus)

The wallflowers, one headlight

Somewhere there's speaking
It's already coming in
Oh and it's rising at the back of your mind
You never could get it
Unless you were fed it
Now you're here and you don't know why

But under skinned knees and the skid marks
Past the places where you used to learn
You howl and listen
Listen and wait for the
Echoes of angels who won't return

[Chorus]
He's everything you want
He's everything you need
He's everything inside of you
That you wish you could be
He says all the right things
At exactly the right time
But he means nothing to you
And you don't know why

You're waiting for someone
To put you together
You're waiting for someone to push you away
There's always another wound to discover
There's always something more you wish he'd say

[Chorus]

But you'll just sit tight
And watch it unwind
It's only what you're asking for
And you'll be just fine
With all of your time
It's only what you're waiting for

Out of the island
Into the highway
Past the places where you might have turned
You never did notice
But you still hide away
The anger of angels who won't return

[Chorus]
I am everything you want
I am everything you need
I am everything inside of you
That you wish you could be
I say all the right things
At exactly the right time
But I mean nothing to you and I don't know why
And I don't know why
Why
I don't know

Vertical Horizon- Everything you want

i don't know about you but this has been one mental week i need...some solace

.... so God has spoken finally, He says i am a baby, and i don't deny that. I AM a baby, even my own year 3s says my jewellery is so babyish.

But that aside, on a serious note, while lying on a sofa bed, listening to Darlene Zech,Zesech?'s Sing of Your Great Love, from the depths of my soul, something wept and i felt wetness on my cheeks. Grand huh. Somehow only he can manage to break my defenses down like that. But i am grateful for this, that in this world, nobody else manages to tear down the walls, the thick barriers i built to protect my self that ends up being a trap, like he does. well we know who we are talking about.

why that vast gap that i can't cross, why that ocean of impossiblity to my human fragility. i try my best everyday but it's never enough. and thus this vortex within my soul that refuses to be ignored. i hate my damn childishness, babyishness, and selfishness, but then i am scared to death of what might happen. So it's here again, where we wrestle with him and then let him break a part of us to remember this moment forever.

i'm not at the part of the journey where i can't see ahead, i am certain that no matter what crap is thrown this way, there is hope, he will never give up on me but i rather give up on myself. it's like hanging onto a cliff, and it's not fun that way. i know for sure that the rainbow shall come, that spring still remains, that somehow it's not as fun without the shite, but then, when dirt is thrown my way and when the test stakes are high, i can't help but derail. so...what is there to do? But thank God for mercy, thank God that i don't know many things and that i am only but a worm.

we all need someone like that who is willing to tear down our defenses with his bare hands and then protect us with those hands that are made for protecting, not cold hard walls, and then when we are ready to run again, he lets us go. who is there like that? i know i am not.